God has sure been workin me over on this outreach! ive been learning and cramming so much in my head it is hard to organize it all in order to process it and write it out for this update. My last writings depícted the struggles and cries of my heart. But through struggle comes growth...and i am slowly continuing to lay the bricks of my faith foundation.
I have realized that change and transformation need to happen from the inside out. Focusing on your own heart, your own relationship, passion and love for the Lord, your own amount of love for people...before you can effectively ask others to do the very same.
And while we are mentioning love...i have learned a lil bit on that too. I have learned and am in the process of applying lol...specifically...love for "the church"...for fellow believers and breaking it down even a bit more...love for those believers who are satisfied with the mundane and living in passive religiousity. I need the same love for these that I already have burning within me for "the lost"...for those that are not aware of their identity that they are entitled to through a life with Christ. The hurting...abused...abandoned...the victims. why am i so judgemental of my fellow brothers n sisters? how can I rule a guilty verdict when i am so far from perfect myself? Its pride. well its alot of things that make me angry...but none of them entitles me to be so. So pride it is.
So i am working on my own change on the inside....while that will hopefully affect the church...which in turn...will ultimately be the army that God has established to admister truth to their own communities...to the OUTSIDE!!! To the lost, hurting, etc. It is a chain reaction that i was picturing with the same outcome...but with a huge piece of the puzzle missing. That being the church. I dont know how i missed it. Jesus talks so highly of the church..."His Body". I mean...He was kinda serious about it. It is kinda a big deal=)
So i continue to learn...and be transformed...no matter how painful it may be. I was gratefully reminded by a pretty amazing friend of this following verse in James 1:1-4: "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds; for you know that the testing of your faith develops perserverence. Perserverence must finish its work so that you may become mature and complete...not lacking anything."
Quite the truth. Its funny how verses come alive to you as they apply so accurately to your given circumstances. I am being continually reminded to be faithful with what i see as "little"...in order that God can trust me with the "bigger". I also appreciate this quote from Oswald Chambers: "Service is not what you do for Christ, but who you are for Him." I am so thankful for that because i am not sure of all the ways in which God is using me here...but i do know without a doubt that He is molding me...and for that i will praise Him and continue to perservere.
Thank you all for the e-mails, n posts of encouragement and words of wisdom and truth. You seriously help me out SO much in my processing and learning! I am so thankful for my community of support...thank you for fighting with me. Continue to press fervently in to our Father so that we can passionately praise Him through every feeling and circumstance of life. May we glorify our Savior with ALL that we are and truly KNOW the Father who we serve with our lives.
With love...
Kate
Extra Prayer Points:
**LUIS---a young man that i got a chance to talk with at the juvenile prison that we went to. He seemed genuinely thankful for the words that i taught on. He is searching for truth...you can see it in his eyes...but he has alot of the crap from this world up against him. help me in lifting him up in prayer and interceding for him to God.
*That i can effectively learn how to better harness my anger which on more than one occasion have been rather surprised with. ugghhh...emotions!
*Continuing to trust God no matter the situation...no matter if i cannot totally trust people.
*The teams health...lots of sickness
*Team unity...which comes thru selfless love (theres that love word again!)
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