Round two:) Sorry but i gotta get sum of these thoughts outta my head because too much information is coming in and i gotta filter sum out to make room lol.
So...here we go...Here are sum of what has been going on in my life the past couple weeks...
Finances. Money. Loans. AHHH!! Just hearing and actually just writing out those words causes major panicking within my head and the kind of anxiousness that you would feel right before taking an important final exam. there is so much negativity attached to these words for me. On wednesdays we have a faith n finances optional fasting of lunch. well...for me it automatically becomes breakfast and lunch lol. anyways...I was deferring loans 2 wednesdays ago...and was going to go into the prayer and fasting group time, but was freaking out from discussing the word money with loan people, so i decided to breathe and take sum time alone with my Daddy. I was thinking...dang, why the heck am i here in LA...learning how to best put my ministry visions into play...if i have no chance at making it a reality?
The way i was seeing it was that my student loan debt was standing in the way from what the Lord is calling me to. Tangibly it is in the way...but then again...is it really in God's way?? Is anything really bigger than God?! Is anything really an unmovable obstacle for Him?? As i was walking and praying out aloud (people passing by prolly thot i was psychotic) lol...He hit me with these words: "What is it really going to cost you to have true faith?" And my sudden realization: It will cost me nothing...in terms of wordly money...it will cost me everything in terms of laying down my freaking fear.
This is what i have to give up: The embedded lie that my life is not of real value and worth to the 'mission field'; that i have not earned the gift of grace and lavishing of the fulfillment of my dreams; that i'm not good enough to pursue the passions that God has laid so heavily on my heart; i have to lay down the thought (lie) that God will not provide for me in this way; that He has better people to choose and to invest in....that He is not more powerful than debt. I realized that i had to choose...yes, once again...God is urging me to choose. To choose Him over Me. The reality of WHO He is....and the reality of the lies that i so easily hold on to and let myself get held back by.
This enlightening of his power and love for me is surprisingly overwhelming for me...it means i have responsibility to act of truth. to pick my feet up out of this sludge...and continue to pursue...with ALL OUT FAITH...that which God has laid before me, and how he has laid out each step for me. I am not in control!! haha...ahh...its so scarey...why? I suck at life when i try n take control...why is it so frightening to give it up? Oh God...help me!! Help me to give this life up as yours. ALL of me...not just a part. You are not just Lord over my Sundays or worship times...you are Lord over every freaking area of my life. Take it. Continue to help me walk this out...my Daddy...my Provider.
oh...forgot to mention: the week following this revelation was entitled "Faith & Finances" during lecture LOL. Does God have a sense of humor or what??!
Sorry...for all you practical and realistic thinkers:)....yeah this means simply that i am learning to have trust and this kind of radical faith in every part---meaning even in my finances part---of my life. SO...right now i am not totally sure of the next steps...of HOW God will choose to provide for me...but i'm thinkin its gunna be pretty radical:) cuz thats my life. and thats my God that i serve. haha...He blows my mind. So i will continue to pursue HIM....and He will direct my steps. This may mean pursuing Him...pleasing him over people...i don't know. it usually does!
Pray for me, PLEASE. particularly for direction; boldness of faith and pursuit; walking out his will at whatever the particular cost; and strength in obedience.
Thank you. I could not live this life without the encouragement, and truth in love/guidance that i receive from so many!!!
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Peter-Like Transformation:
so we've been spending sum time in praise n worship to go over the gifts of the Holy Spirit, and this week we focused on gentleness. Sometimes i think that my general and overall demeanor is for the most part gentle...but now n then...and when the "then" is too often the "now"...i feel like i could explode with impulsive aggression. Appearantly Peter had this problem as well in his beginning stages of walking out his faith. In the Garden of Gethsemene (sp?)...while he was sposed to be praying it up, he was interrupted by the high priests coming to convict Jesus. Peter pulls out this knife that i guess he just keeps on him for praying purposes??...and wacks off the ear of the high priest's slave. thats sum pretty intense impulsivity n aggression.
So Jesus rebukes him and all...and then later on, when Peter is writing it up in the New Testament...he encourages us to take a gentle and Christ-like approach to our anger. I think he had sum time in-between writings to work on this character quality...but i just thought it was cool to see the vast transformation get painted out by the Master Artist. Gentleness. Gentle anger. And this term does not mean weak or passive anger...i think gentleness has been given a bad name by western society that values conquere thru force and standing for your rights at any and every cost. the cost of character...the cost of morality...the cost of your entire soul. Gentle anger involves fighting with dignity and with Christ as our guide.
This is the process of extreme transformation that i seek for my own life as a follower of God. A life lived BY FAITH. BY EXPERIENCE. BELIEF=BYLIFE. My worst fear: To become complacent...stuck in my---self. I seriously have nothing to live for in and of myself. Its brokenness. Its a tangled web of confusion and lack of true identity...fear...hopelessness. Its death. I don't know how many times i pray to God to save me from my self. I am my worst enemy at this point in my life. Belief is a choice. Its a choice for me to get up every day and choose to live in freedom...to choose life and not death. to choose my identity, my destiny...hope. I get to choose to either fall back or move forward each day. This realization of the urgency of need to take authority in who I am in Christ is kinda overwhelming...but sobering at the same time. I have a choice! sometimes i forget this. Actually i forget this alot. But everyday...haha...everyday i choose, i hammer the nail in that much more:) And since this life is such a process....one day maybe that nail will be cemented in all the way. And i'll be able to tackle the next one...and the next...constantly improving my foundation, and opening the door to freedom that much more.
Thank you, God, for being so patient with me.
So Jesus rebukes him and all...and then later on, when Peter is writing it up in the New Testament...he encourages us to take a gentle and Christ-like approach to our anger. I think he had sum time in-between writings to work on this character quality...but i just thought it was cool to see the vast transformation get painted out by the Master Artist. Gentleness. Gentle anger. And this term does not mean weak or passive anger...i think gentleness has been given a bad name by western society that values conquere thru force and standing for your rights at any and every cost. the cost of character...the cost of morality...the cost of your entire soul. Gentle anger involves fighting with dignity and with Christ as our guide.
This is the process of extreme transformation that i seek for my own life as a follower of God. A life lived BY FAITH. BY EXPERIENCE. BELIEF=BYLIFE. My worst fear: To become complacent...stuck in my---self. I seriously have nothing to live for in and of myself. Its brokenness. Its a tangled web of confusion and lack of true identity...fear...hopelessness. Its death. I don't know how many times i pray to God to save me from my self. I am my worst enemy at this point in my life. Belief is a choice. Its a choice for me to get up every day and choose to live in freedom...to choose life and not death. to choose my identity, my destiny...hope. I get to choose to either fall back or move forward each day. This realization of the urgency of need to take authority in who I am in Christ is kinda overwhelming...but sobering at the same time. I have a choice! sometimes i forget this. Actually i forget this alot. But everyday...haha...everyday i choose, i hammer the nail in that much more:) And since this life is such a process....one day maybe that nail will be cemented in all the way. And i'll be able to tackle the next one...and the next...constantly improving my foundation, and opening the door to freedom that much more.
Thank you, God, for being so patient with me.
Monday, April 12, 2010
Don't Waste Your Walk:
I'm feelin this title more than ever in several key areas of my life lived in Christ. "Don't Wast Your Walk"...what does this mean to me??
First, it means walking in my true identity of who i now know i am through being a daughter of the most High King. Not living in the lies that often nag at my thoughts: "God is unhappy with me, so i must do something good to appease Him"; "God is changeable and may alter his opinion of me at any time, so i have to constantly prove i'm a good daughter"; or that "God is simply a responder and will react to me with either punishment or reward, so i will do all things that merit a reward".
The key to trampling over these lies is replacing them with truths. For instance, grasping the concept of our restored identity...that we are "seated with him" through the simple yet complex power of the cross...of His incomprehendable love and mercy. Remembering that it was his plan at the very start of life to place us (our sinful and ignorant selves) in Him (who is perfect and always holy). He proves this to us by giving us the gift of the Holy Spirit (His Spirit), to us...not to leave us whenever we mess up, but to show us what his never-ending love and grace looks like, guiding and carrying us through life's endless battles.
As God restores our identity...he simultaneously reveals it to us in ways that we are able to comprehend and individually apply to our self-image. Through revelation of our identity, we are taught how to walk it out...what a worthy and new walk looks like, as compared to the Father's, and now that we are aware, the admonition and warning of not wasting that walk.
Thirdly, we are now capable of retaining this new identity by standing firm in our faith and in God's strength versus our own. we are able to utilize the power of the Holy Spirit in our lives and actively live out who we are as sons and daughters of Jesus Christ!
Powers of darkness have lied to us and told us that "only some of us were meant for ministry". This is the reason that so many people groups are still unaware of God's testimony and salvation. EVERYONE has "A CALL" on their life. Christianity is a 24-7 way of life...not just something to be categorized into a sunday church attendance or wednesday night prayer group. It is HOW you live out your faith. Being a Christian equals an OUTFLOW vs an inflow. The Spirit of God is upon us to meet the needs of humanity. How are you doing this in your everyday life?? To minister means to serve. How are you serving?? Serving is not to be done JUST within the church but to every being (Mark 16:15). I think sometimes we view service as merely an occasional good act conducted within the safe walls of the church. while serving within the church is an aspect of servanthood, it is not the whole of it. we are called to minister and deliver the gospel message to "every creature"...not just those you know are open to hearing it.
God has been asking me over and over lately to what degree will i sacrifice for Him. What will i give up...what parts of my self am i willing to die to...and to what degree?? How important is it to me to truely and, with full out pursuit of passion, live my life according to his will for me as i understand it...to throw off my old identity and fully embrace who i am in Him. It leads to many crises of dilemmas...forks in the faith road where i have to consciously choose to obey and dive in...sometimes blindly, sometimes aware of the diffulty that lies ahead.
How do you walk out your faith...your hope...your love of Jesus Christ every day?? Is it a passion to you? A value that you have cultivated in your life? Or are we merely making excuses for our laziness through our human tendencies towards certain personality characteristics? "I don't share the gospel with unbelievers because I am not a quote on quote evangelist?" That is a very dangerous mindset to allow our faith to be controlled by. Are we not called to proclaim his name to every generation and people? Are we categorizing our faith? Pursuing Christianity merely on Sunday's?
"Let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us." Heb. 12:1.
What are we willing to sacrifice to bear the name of Jesus? To carry out his love to our communities...countries...nations?? Will we be challenged to give up time? Maybe its a steady income of money...personal inconveniencies of uncomfortable situations. Are we really willing to take up our cross and walk this faith life out? Better yet...to walk it out with reckless abdandon...abandonment of self, recognition, pride, comfort, maybe stability......?
First, it means walking in my true identity of who i now know i am through being a daughter of the most High King. Not living in the lies that often nag at my thoughts: "God is unhappy with me, so i must do something good to appease Him"; "God is changeable and may alter his opinion of me at any time, so i have to constantly prove i'm a good daughter"; or that "God is simply a responder and will react to me with either punishment or reward, so i will do all things that merit a reward".
The key to trampling over these lies is replacing them with truths. For instance, grasping the concept of our restored identity...that we are "seated with him" through the simple yet complex power of the cross...of His incomprehendable love and mercy. Remembering that it was his plan at the very start of life to place us (our sinful and ignorant selves) in Him (who is perfect and always holy). He proves this to us by giving us the gift of the Holy Spirit (His Spirit), to us...not to leave us whenever we mess up, but to show us what his never-ending love and grace looks like, guiding and carrying us through life's endless battles.
As God restores our identity...he simultaneously reveals it to us in ways that we are able to comprehend and individually apply to our self-image. Through revelation of our identity, we are taught how to walk it out...what a worthy and new walk looks like, as compared to the Father's, and now that we are aware, the admonition and warning of not wasting that walk.
Thirdly, we are now capable of retaining this new identity by standing firm in our faith and in God's strength versus our own. we are able to utilize the power of the Holy Spirit in our lives and actively live out who we are as sons and daughters of Jesus Christ!
Powers of darkness have lied to us and told us that "only some of us were meant for ministry". This is the reason that so many people groups are still unaware of God's testimony and salvation. EVERYONE has "A CALL" on their life. Christianity is a 24-7 way of life...not just something to be categorized into a sunday church attendance or wednesday night prayer group. It is HOW you live out your faith. Being a Christian equals an OUTFLOW vs an inflow. The Spirit of God is upon us to meet the needs of humanity. How are you doing this in your everyday life?? To minister means to serve. How are you serving?? Serving is not to be done JUST within the church but to every being (Mark 16:15). I think sometimes we view service as merely an occasional good act conducted within the safe walls of the church. while serving within the church is an aspect of servanthood, it is not the whole of it. we are called to minister and deliver the gospel message to "every creature"...not just those you know are open to hearing it.
God has been asking me over and over lately to what degree will i sacrifice for Him. What will i give up...what parts of my self am i willing to die to...and to what degree?? How important is it to me to truely and, with full out pursuit of passion, live my life according to his will for me as i understand it...to throw off my old identity and fully embrace who i am in Him. It leads to many crises of dilemmas...forks in the faith road where i have to consciously choose to obey and dive in...sometimes blindly, sometimes aware of the diffulty that lies ahead.
How do you walk out your faith...your hope...your love of Jesus Christ every day?? Is it a passion to you? A value that you have cultivated in your life? Or are we merely making excuses for our laziness through our human tendencies towards certain personality characteristics? "I don't share the gospel with unbelievers because I am not a quote on quote evangelist?" That is a very dangerous mindset to allow our faith to be controlled by. Are we not called to proclaim his name to every generation and people? Are we categorizing our faith? Pursuing Christianity merely on Sunday's?
"Let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us." Heb. 12:1.
What are we willing to sacrifice to bear the name of Jesus? To carry out his love to our communities...countries...nations?? Will we be challenged to give up time? Maybe its a steady income of money...personal inconveniencies of uncomfortable situations. Are we really willing to take up our cross and walk this faith life out? Better yet...to walk it out with reckless abdandon...abandonment of self, recognition, pride, comfort, maybe stability......?
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Who Defines You?? Your Life Or Your Life Giver?
Starting SOMD (School Of Ministry Development) off to a tight start with Passions, as our first week of teaching and Effective Personal Ministry, this week. Already I've been blown away with the eye opening discovery of truths that God is placing in bold letters on my heart, and highlighting as foundational areas in my life that i need to continue to cultivate and hammer in.
So lets start it up with passion:)...
I've discovered a few flaws in some of my motivations concerning my passions. For example, my highly prioritized passion of justice. Some of the roots as to how I pursue justice within the depths of my heart seem to flow from a hint of tinted unjust and unrighteous anger...and cover not only the unjust actions being witnessed, but also take aim at the individual perpetrating the injustice. I desire for my heart to be as lined up as possible with the heart and just anger of the Lord's so as to ensue the most effective outcome possible; those changes that impart the most positive significance to further the kingdom of Christ and to proclaim justice out of LOVE for not only the broken-hearted and abused, but also for the abusers.
ouch. The only way for me to pursue this selfless form of justice and love is to dive further into the heart and character of my Jesus. Our passions determine what we believe in as well as our behaviors. I do not want to react out of my selfish ambition and judgmental imposition, but out of God's heart and his alone. Jesus asks us "Are you willing to drink this cup?"; Are we willing to sacrifice...suffer for...perhaps die for_________?
Christ did all of these for the sake of sinners. Those sinners of which were not limited to child molesters, psychopathic murderers, cheaters, or those who inflicted pain on this world. He saw their sin and loved them as who he intended them to be...how he created them...he grieved the loss of their souls and hearts; and yes, he is angered at injustices committed, but does not direct his anger at the "who" of the sinner but instead, focuses his anger on the "what".
Its an intense and convicting basis of thought and substance of heart! We have to be DESPERATE to throw off our old and wrong passions of the heart, and with wholehearted urgency, pursue the passions of God's heart.
This is why it is so essential to baptize our minds so that they are soaked in spiritual truth and passion. Our beliefs should influence our life experiences more so than our life experiences influencing our beliefs. How you live puts on display what it is that you are devoted to! For example....is your life characterized by the priority of watching the most recent episode of the bachelor---feeding your present comforts---self-protection---spending the majority of your time watching tv, reading pointless material, or for me...listening to music that distracts me from what my true identity in Christ really is. Look at your bank statement...what do you spend the most money on? What do you find yourself talking about over and over with all your friends...yourself? Things about you? Recognizing your passions and what you place high value on helps you to see the influences that have shaped you. It helps you decide what kind of impact you want your life to leave behind.
It was humbling and revealing to analyze and recognize my own passions and values, thus also being made aware of my non-biblical values or aspects that need to be improved and strengthened. And I encourage you to do the same...to put your passions, your values, under the microscope and look through the heart of God. It is important that we continue to move forward in our growth as followers of Christ so that we are capable of bringing the most glory to our Father as possible...so that the most people are reached and communicated appropriately and rightly about the heart of our Daddy...and so that their lives may also be the most effective for influencing others towards the heart of God, thus furthering His kingdom and glory, one of our highest goals as servants and children of God!
And I'll stop with the highlights of this past teaching and save this week's series for a different setting so as not to bore you and hurt my brain any further:) As always, I am humbled and encouraged by your support and love in my pursuit of God, his truths, and present and future ministries!!
To all my financial supporters...I have all of my money in for my school fees, but I am still trying to raise more money for outreach ministry both right after this school (perhaps partnering with a few other students) and continued ministry---be that where God leads me at the proper time. I am also trying to pay off my monthly school loans while I am here. I am thinking that 3,000 would be sufficient for any oversees outreach (Brazil) !!....yeah still workin the money thing out with my Papa. Gotta love this faith thing!! If you are interested in donating, there is the donate button at the top/right corner of this blog site---electronic deposit. and I will hook ya up with the address here as well:
YWAM LA- (Kate Hunt-SOMD) *Do not write my name directly on a check but include on a slip of paper (make out just to: YWAM LA)
11141 Osborne Street
Lake View Terrace, CA 91342
MUCH LOVE!...
Kate Hunt
So lets start it up with passion:)...
I've discovered a few flaws in some of my motivations concerning my passions. For example, my highly prioritized passion of justice. Some of the roots as to how I pursue justice within the depths of my heart seem to flow from a hint of tinted unjust and unrighteous anger...and cover not only the unjust actions being witnessed, but also take aim at the individual perpetrating the injustice. I desire for my heart to be as lined up as possible with the heart and just anger of the Lord's so as to ensue the most effective outcome possible; those changes that impart the most positive significance to further the kingdom of Christ and to proclaim justice out of LOVE for not only the broken-hearted and abused, but also for the abusers.
ouch. The only way for me to pursue this selfless form of justice and love is to dive further into the heart and character of my Jesus. Our passions determine what we believe in as well as our behaviors. I do not want to react out of my selfish ambition and judgmental imposition, but out of God's heart and his alone. Jesus asks us "Are you willing to drink this cup?"; Are we willing to sacrifice...suffer for...perhaps die for_________?
Christ did all of these for the sake of sinners. Those sinners of which were not limited to child molesters, psychopathic murderers, cheaters, or those who inflicted pain on this world. He saw their sin and loved them as who he intended them to be...how he created them...he grieved the loss of their souls and hearts; and yes, he is angered at injustices committed, but does not direct his anger at the "who" of the sinner but instead, focuses his anger on the "what".
Its an intense and convicting basis of thought and substance of heart! We have to be DESPERATE to throw off our old and wrong passions of the heart, and with wholehearted urgency, pursue the passions of God's heart.
This is why it is so essential to baptize our minds so that they are soaked in spiritual truth and passion. Our beliefs should influence our life experiences more so than our life experiences influencing our beliefs. How you live puts on display what it is that you are devoted to! For example....is your life characterized by the priority of watching the most recent episode of the bachelor---feeding your present comforts---self-protection---spending the majority of your time watching tv, reading pointless material, or for me...listening to music that distracts me from what my true identity in Christ really is. Look at your bank statement...what do you spend the most money on? What do you find yourself talking about over and over with all your friends...yourself? Things about you? Recognizing your passions and what you place high value on helps you to see the influences that have shaped you. It helps you decide what kind of impact you want your life to leave behind.
It was humbling and revealing to analyze and recognize my own passions and values, thus also being made aware of my non-biblical values or aspects that need to be improved and strengthened. And I encourage you to do the same...to put your passions, your values, under the microscope and look through the heart of God. It is important that we continue to move forward in our growth as followers of Christ so that we are capable of bringing the most glory to our Father as possible...so that the most people are reached and communicated appropriately and rightly about the heart of our Daddy...and so that their lives may also be the most effective for influencing others towards the heart of God, thus furthering His kingdom and glory, one of our highest goals as servants and children of God!
And I'll stop with the highlights of this past teaching and save this week's series for a different setting so as not to bore you and hurt my brain any further:) As always, I am humbled and encouraged by your support and love in my pursuit of God, his truths, and present and future ministries!!
To all my financial supporters...I have all of my money in for my school fees, but I am still trying to raise more money for outreach ministry both right after this school (perhaps partnering with a few other students) and continued ministry---be that where God leads me at the proper time. I am also trying to pay off my monthly school loans while I am here. I am thinking that 3,000 would be sufficient for any oversees outreach (Brazil) !!....yeah still workin the money thing out with my Papa. Gotta love this faith thing!! If you are interested in donating, there is the donate button at the top/right corner of this blog site---electronic deposit. and I will hook ya up with the address here as well:
YWAM LA- (Kate Hunt-SOMD) *Do not write my name directly on a check but include on a slip of paper (make out just to: YWAM LA)
11141 Osborne Street
Lake View Terrace, CA 91342
MUCH LOVE!...
Kate Hunt
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)